April 1, 2008

12:03 AM April 1st, 2008

Loud thumping on the back door.

I open my eyes and lay perfectly still, wondering if I heard what I think I heard.
"Stan, did you hear knocking?"

Thump thump thump thump!

We scramble out of bed and grab clothes. I see a light flashing through my six year old's room and look out the window. There are two police officers looking up at me, shining their light directly into my face.

Open the window!

Can you come down here, Ma'am?

Stan and I go to the back door where three policemen are waiting on the back porch.

We're looking for a kid who's gone missing and evidently your son and his friends do drugs in your garage. Is your son here?

Wha? When you've been asleep for two hours and police wake you saying that your son and his friends are known to do drugs in your garage and one of his friends is missing, I assure you, you have no bloomin' idea where your son is. I ran up to his room, threw on the light and stood at the end of his bed.

"The police are here and they say you and your friends do drugs in the garage."
What???? Nooo!
"Come down, they want to talk to you."

Seth appears at the back door in a t-shirt, striped boxer briefs and a breathing strip over his nose.

Hey, do you know [person's name] or [person's name] or [person's name?]
I recognize the girl's name...I think...I don't know.

The girl ... well, she sort of looks like you (he says to Seth) she is your height, your build, but has long blond hair.

I said, "You got him outta bed to tell him he looks like a girl?"

Nobody laughed.

The officers glance at each other, look again at Seth and see that we're all clueless and confused and that we're all unstylish bedtime dressers. The one standing closest to Seth says,

Uh. I think we have the wrong house.

Well, Happy April Fools Day to you too, Officers.
Pranking a little early this year, aren't we?
Ever wonder why police officers are allowed to go around throwing statements accusing people and shining lights in windows and pulling you out of bed, all the while not having any idea what they're doing? (Oh, some girl told them and pointed to our garage.)

Then they went next door and bothered that mom and her teenage boy, who ~gee willikers~ turns out has the same name as the kid they were looking to question.   Eh, life's interesting.


Still Not Goin Quietly said...

Geez Louise!!! I can promise you they would have ended up carting me off to jail because I would've gone OFF. I freak out anytime there is a knock or a ring after 10pm and the sight of police on my lawn... Yup, I'da been waving bye-bye from the back seat....

Sol said...

I had been working on a car, so I was grease from head to toe when I got the call.. "Mom, the police arrested me and I didn't do it." You just know when your son is lying and when he's telling the truth so I went to his rescue.

It had been rally day at school. All the football players had to wear their jerseys. The child that SHOULD have been arrested was number 50 on the football team, caucasion... my son was 50 on the SENIOR football team but he is American Native.. not to be confused with a caucasion. I asked the officer if he asked anyone if it was possible that there are two number 50's ...and there are. Junior and Senior. But nothing will erase my son being cuffed and in the car, nor did it erase me sticking my greasy hand out to shake the cops hand after I told him off.

Oh, came from Michele's too!

rosemary said...

Amazing and stupid all at once. Makes you wonder about the entrance requirements for officering.

Paul said...

You think that's bad? Hah! You better be glad it wasn't that demon Johnny Sutton who came a-knockin' on your window.

Free the Border Patrol agents Campos and Rameon. Put Johnny Sutton in their place.

Oops, I didn't realize I could vent like that.