March 10, 2010

Fort My Kids

I caught a glimpse of this backyard construction my kids have been building lately and something in my brain banged and yelled urgently, waking me up from my March funk: What is wrong with this picture? I approached cautiously.
I'm reminded of one of those seek 'n find drawings.
I see a broken tailbone with a good knot on the back of the skull thrown in.
Do you have any idea how many times I've been to the hospital in the last few years?
I don't either but I've come to know a recipe for disaster when I see one.

This tree fell over in the heavy snow we had this winter. Now it's a makeshift climbing course/fort-holder-upper.

Sean, with excitement: I climb all the way out here and then bang through the branches until I hit the ground! Upon closer inspection....

I find boards with nails flung around the main floor of the fort.
Intentional obstacle course or wrecklessness?
I order Oldest to promptly find his brain, take it out into the backyard and quickly apply it to the matter at hand before the children come home from school.
And also this foot-puncturing mother of all beds of upright rusty nails as well, please.
Don't even enlarge this photo, it'll make your toes curl.


What the.

This is the little house oldest boy built as an assignment for homeschooling many years ago.

I tried, people.
update: Right after I drew up a waiver for all the neighborhood parents to sign I noticed that Dad is out back fixing the contraption, muttering to himself about such things as the importance of nonhalfassedness. No need to call the authorities, a little public exposure and my reporting skills saved the children.


Mom said...

Being the mother of boys is such a wonderful adventure in fear, panic and pride.

rosemary said...

Why Jennie, I think you have the makings of a few architects!!! Actually it is quite creative. Do you think they would have hooked the hose up to the slide and actually gone down the thing?

Jennie said...

Now Rosemary, if you were still a nurse I'd think you were trying to drum up business.

"...hook up a hose to to slide...." grumble grumble

Frankly there was a time I would have been delighted to see such creativity. Now, battered and beleaguered, I just want everyone lined up in front of a video game.

Paul Nichols said...

That is an awesome "fort." It even comes with a tree!

I had one of those when I grew up and I wouldn't trade it for the most comfortable joint in town. I never fell out of it; I only got one tetanus shot; plenty of apricots to see me through meal times; mom knew where I was (hammer-hammer-saw-saw); and a stack of comic books helped while away the hot summer hours. Life is good.

Don't worry about your boys. I'm just sayin'. And that's the W V of the day: "sayin." Really